Hellooo Reader, Suraj here –
I have a disease. Well, it’s not a clinically recognized disease, but it is one that is widely prevalent. It’s called the “shiny object syndrome.” The concept itself is not what I want to focus on, so I’ll get it out of the way.
Shiny Object Syndrome (SOS) is the behavioral tendency of constantly getting attracted to or distracted by new, potentially more exciting opportunities, while abandoning the current task or goal. This is useful primarily while thinking about goals and projects one is working on. However, I wanted to focus on the broader application of SOS and its consequences.
Recently, I wrote about our life being like a story book with multiple chapters. I also made a point about there potentially always being a chance of something better (things, people) coming along. But at this point in life, I’m reconsidering that assumption. What if that doesn’t happen? What if we keep looking for something better, something more compatible, or someone with whom life would be easier? What if we don’t find that thing or person?
What if?
This reminds me of a story I had heard once upon a time. The story is of a drowning man. It goes:
A man is drowning in the middle of the sea. A small boat with a fisherman comes, and the fisherman offers help. The drowning man says, “No, my God will come to save me.” The fisherman goes away.
In a while, a bigger boat with a crew comes. They offer help, but, again, the drowning man says, “No, my God will come and save me.” The crew leaves.
Then, a huge ship comes for rescue, and again the drowning man doesn’t accept help, saying that his God will save him.
And then he drowns and dies. When he meets God, he questions out of disappointment, “Why didn’t you come save me?”
God responds, “Who do you think sent you the fisherman, the crew, and the ship?”
I fear that in search of something better, what if I let go of something beautiful that I have thinking I will find something better? What if this is the best I will ever have? What if this is what’s meant to be? But what does it even mean for something to be “meant to be”?
I honestly don’t know. What I do have, at this point in life, is some level of fear of the unknown. There is this other thing that I have, too. It is the confidence and hope that, regardless of what happens, I will always figure something out. After all, I write “Figuring Things Out.”
This confidence in my ability of being able to figure things out stems from recognizing that my being where I am, my living the life I’m living, is a very, very unlikely thing. What are the chances that out of all the sperm cells, I would develop into a zygote, and then later, myself? What are the chances that out of all that could be, this is what happened? My being here is not just an outcome of my own choices, but also of the choices of others. My university had to accept my application for me to come to New York and live where I’m living, for example.
If one decision had been taken differently, not just on my side, but also on someone else’s side, life would’ve been very different, fundamentally different.
So the hope I live by is, if I have been able to come here, I can go anywhere. I can become anything I want to be. Yes, if it’s meant to be, it’ll be, but also I recognize that it will require effort on my side. And that effort, I’m willing to put in.
So, a few things:
- Recognize and value the things and people you have
- Be hopeful that when need be, you’ll figure things out
- Put in the effort to make things happen rather than waiting for a miracle
I hope this gave you something interesting to think about over the weekend.
I’ll see you next week.
Warmly,
Suraj
